Rules for Mike McGee

14. Create a graphic design portfolio.

Hey man,

You have been doing a lot of graphic design at Northwestern. So why don’t you put it all in one place? Like a portfolio?

Thank me later.

13. Keep extra clothes in the office.

You never know when you will pull that all-nighter. Or maybe you do know when you will pull that all-nighter! Either way, it is good to have extra clothes in your office so you can make that quick change before you head otuside again.

You see way too many people too often to be caught in the same clothes…

12. It sucks to be the starter, but someone has to do it.

Hey man,

Don’t you hate when people don’t speak up in discussion section? Yeah, me too. But you have been given the herculean task of BS-ing some comment just to get the convo started.

So what if it is stupid - because it usually is - the goal is to get other students to talk since they seem to be temporarily paralyzed after a question is asked.

You will be rewarded for your service someday.

11. NEVER give up on your fantasy football team.

Hey man,

You dissapointed me this weekend. Yes your team was down by 85 points Sunday afternoon. Yes your team was down by 62 points going into to Monday night. Yes your running backs combined for 10 points while your opponent racked up 48.

THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE!

With a combination of Kurt Warner (300+ yards, 3TDs) Steve Breaston (7 rec, 121 yds, 138 return yds) and Arizona Defense (2 ints, 1 fum rec, 1 MAJOR GOAL LINE STAND), you overcame that deficit to win by 3!

You are now in sole position of first place. Never give up.

10. Make rules for Barack Obama

Hey man,

I have had fun making rules for you, but other people need my help. Especially this one guy…

Don’t worry, I will make time for you too!

9. Check your “Future” Gmail label everyday

You never know what it might hold…

7. Don’t break your rules!

Hey man,

You think just because I put these rules down that you will easily follow them? WRONG! That’s why I’m callin you out. Follow the rules!

6. Don’t use the elevator to go up (or down) one floor!

Ok Mike, I know you don’t do this, but just advice to others, don’t use the elevator to go up or down one floor! WTF dude! Are you that lazy that you have to use the elevator, waste 30 seconds, when you could just went up one flight of stairs?!?

Now I understand if you have a lot in your hands (food, equipment, luggage, etc.) But way too often I am in the elevator going from the ground floor to the third floor of Norris, when someone else gets on and hits the first floor! But it’s get worse! We stop at the first floor, that punk gets off, then someone else gets on, and is just going to the SECOND FLOOR!! AHHHHHH!!!!

In order to use the elevator you must at least move two floors or more. Final.

Sincerely,

President of Common Sense and Non-Lazy People

5. Avoid meetings/open-ended discussions between 10pm-1am.

This is the story of your life man. You finally get done with classes and meetings all day, it’s 10pm, and you start talking with your ASG buddies. That’s fine man, but when you get done and it’s 1am, and you realize that you could have used that 3 hours to get stuff done, don’t look at me.

I understand that sometimes you can’t avoid it, but about John McCain % (equal to 90%) of the time you can. You will realize how much work you can get done in that period.

Just trying to help you out.

Sincerely,

Your better half